The summer is here...the Proteas are not!

So, I guess summer has arrived in the mother City, as there is no shortage of high velocity wind abounding out of the South East, tired of it already. Probably about as tired as I am of watching the Proteas trip and stumble their way around tournaments, whenever they are touted as favourites, which isn't as often as a Blue Moon. So much for standing side by side with the man in the melon hat and banging the boards to support our boys play and watch the enemy being humbled...(Standard bank needs to redo there wording of that advert, and as for the slogan "moving forward", all the Proteas have done is regress)

As far as I'm concerned, it started as early as day one, when Graeme Smith won the toss and elected to bowl...what? I was always taught, when you win the toss, nine out of ten times you bat first, the tenth time, you think about it, then bat. It is totally exaserbated by the mere fact that SA hadn't played competitive cricket for 4 months, something you can only pull off successfully if you're playing League Cricket in Holland. Funny, but true.

Mark Lifman may have not been found guilty of "playing around" with under age kids, but when the Proteas play like under aged kids, someone has to be found guilty. It's all cool to talk the talk, of brave cricket and doing the basics right, but if you fail to produce the trophies for the cabinet, then someone has to be accountable after the umteenth time of doing so. In my opinion, there are no accountable people in South African cricket, from Smith, Arthur, all the way to the fitness trainer and Gerald Majola. Vince Barnes, heard of him? He is the bowling coach. Long have I moaned that he is not qualified, just in terms of not being a good enough bowler when he played, and also that South African bowlers seem to get the same things wrong day in and day out. Wayne Parnell took wickets, so too Dale Steyn, on occasion, but for the rest, what a load of horse shit. Too many of the "nearly made it's" go and play cricket abroad to make a living, knowing that the procedure here for selection is unjust, and good for them (I did exactly the same). Our depth has, as a result, suffered severe losses. There is no accountability and there's nobody knocking on the door. There is too much comfort and we all know that the best way to get results is through pressure and feeling like you need to perform to keep your place. Long has it been known that due to the selection protocol within South African teams, key players, in positions of power, care only about their pay cheques and not really about results. It is with this in mind, that when I received an sms from Herschelle Gibbs after the loss to Pakistan in the World Cup T20, he said he was so "f*@ked off", which truely surprised me.

The arrogance in how thay have presented themselves publicly on many occassions, leaves one wondering who they think they have become. Tom Cruise? Certainly not, he at least looks fit, albeit short. They always say, shorter people make the best batters. Bradman, Tendulkar, Ponting, Gavaskar.
Don't even get me started on the rotund shape of these players. A few kilo's here and there may have been lost over the winter, but the only two who look like athletes are Johan Botha and Herschelle Gibbs. Wayne Parnell and Dale Steyn to a degree, but they are still young and should have no body fat yet anyway. Give them a couple of years under Graeme Smith's dietry regime and watch them bloom. To me, the fitness trainer should have more of an influence on the cricketers, although at this level, players should take pride in being fit and athletic, as they represent the country, in their cricket and their physical appearance. So far not a good example by a few larger members of the team.

My idea would be to dock players financially for every point they are over a certain Body Mass Index (BMI). That way, they would eat, drink and make merry at their own expense. It would soon lead to South Africa having the leanest, meanest cricket team on the planet. They are professional athletes and they should look and act the part, and I am convinced that there would be fewer examples of cramping and fatigue if this were the case.

Get these over-weight Miami fatties on bicycles, is my call, and I mentioned that to the former Physio, Shane Jabaar, but it seems there is too much at stake and far to much red tape to get that idea implemented. Laziness, over confidence and comfort have all led the Proteas to talk a good game and not be able to deliver on their rather verbose statements when it comes down to the nitty gritty. I also can't fathom why in the name of the "Death Star", do SABC 3 Sport invite a studio guest such as Clare Cowan (I think) to pass her comments on ANY cricket match, let alone an international best seller. It's not that I don't value what a woman has to say about a cricket game, (except Cass Naidoo) I just don't value what a woman has to say about a cricket game, when a South African Professional, who has actually played a game of competitive cricket on this level, could get to do the same...properly. Is SABC Sport run by Leonard Chuene? Or is it Danny Jordaan...hard to keep track of all the inept twits in charge of sporting codes these days.